Your Local Librarian is a tolerant person.

YLL assumes that when a library patron is breaking some rule or regulation it is due to the fact that a) they have never been made aware of said rule, b) they have forgotten said rule, or c) they are physically incapable of remembering any rules whatsoever.

For this reason YLL always gently reminds library patrons of whichever rule they happen to be breaking.  Well, rather,  the first time each day that they need reminding.  If YLL is forced to remind you of a specific rule more than once within say, less than five minutes YLL will become progressively less jolly and understanding.

For example: If one were eating cornflakes straight out of the box while looming directly over the keyboard of the public internet workstation one was using YLL would gently inform you that foodstuffs are not allowed at the computers and you would be politely directed to return said box of cornflakes to your backpack.  If then less the two minutes later YLL distinctly hears you reaching into the box for more sustenance of the cornflake variety YLL may be less warmly affable when approaching you for the second time.

Fortunately you may save yourself from 62 inches of stern disapproval by sheepishly inserting your handful of cornflakes into your front pants pocket.  If you take this tack YLL will simply fix you with a steely eye and inform you that you are in danger of being evicted from the computer workstation before retiring to a staff-only area to laugh hysterically.

You’ve been warned.


Your Local Librarian likes working on Sundays.  Despite the fact that the library is understaffed and busy, YLL thinks those four hours are a lot of fun and go by very quickly. Sundays are popular with the last-minute homework crowd, and YLL doesn’t even mind this–assuming that library users understand that there is a limit to what can be provided for all those procrastinators.  Sure, Your Local Library may have 6 copies of Catcher in the Rye but, just like you, all your classmates left their copies at school and six of them checked our copies out yesterday so they could finish their response papers.  Perhaps this volume of literary criticism will help you…

That said,  one pet peeve of YLL: if you are helping your child with their school project please make them do the work.  Doing your child’s schoolwork sure as heck isn’t going to help them in the long run.